Back to the Drawing Board

Ever have one of those talks with your doctor and hes excited and hes found a medication that will work and he is telling you about a normal life and family vacations where your not in a wheelchair or in pain and you think YES!!! Everything is going to be just fine I am going to be normal again YAYAY!

And then you turn around a few weeks later ...5 to be exact (in my case) and you go backk in to see him and you say "hey doc that wonder drug you gave me well imma wondering why it didn't work."

Well this is my life just before Christmas I spent weeks in the hospital being poked and prodded and tested and retested and then I was finally sent home with Humira and the rest of the gang to begin the journey on the road to wellness.

One week after my Humira shot my hair began to fall out again and the psoriasis spread on my scalp like wildfire. My children came home with a stomach flu and my already weak immune system said Oh! hello there, tummy flu meet meli she wants to test if a person can throw up more contents then they have actually consumed! While my family all had it in a round of two days each (5 kids + hubby) I decided two days thats nothing lets make it five! I called the doctor and he said it will be okay to take my Humira on time when it was due and to keep my chin up I will build a tolerance to things like this...And my immune system must have heard him and been offended because three days after i recover from the tummy bug i caught a sniffle and it was not so bad and then it went the rounds (again 5 kids + hubby if we are going to get sick by golly every one of us has to get it no matter how much try not to) and i caught it again with an added bonus cough this time (yay humira?) it has been four weeks since my release from the hospital cause by my last flare and my starting humira and I have been sickk three times and the last time the doctor says stop the humira and your mtx and heres 14 days worth of antibiotics for your upper respiratory infection (sigh) wonder drug? oh wonder drug where are you?

Well its been six weeks now and not only has the humira allowed me to catch every germ my children have brought home with them it has also had the added fun of actually not working in the least bit for my PsA. Both of my feet are swollen again and my left knee with pain in my right hip and now for even more fun my right thumb is twice the size any thumb should ever be! Considering I had a botched surgery on the tendon in my left hand and it is pretty much numb and I can't really control its grip on things having arthritis in my right hand is bad..very very bad especially since the remote control panal on my wheelchair is on the right side!

So back to the doctor I went today. He said well Frau Hillebrandt (thats me) it seems that Humira is not the right medication for you (really are ya sure doc Argh!) and your in another bad flare and need to have some more cortisone shots flouroscopy style so which hospital would you like to be admitted to I will have my secretary draw up the paperwork and you can go in this afternoon? Okay Stop! dear dear doctor you know I have told you a thousand times before I am a mother of 5 yes 5 care to count them? I can't just go pop into the hospital on a moments notice! Oh and Sunday is my wedding anniversary (13 married 17 together) and my husbands birthday is on the 3rd so how long are we talking here doc and before you answer I will not be available to go until at least Monday as my husband has been planning our anniversary for a few weeks now and since I am his wife I would kind of like to be there for it thank you very much.

Poor doc is not a happy camper but I am home for the weekend and going to find out if my favorite rheumaklinik here in Germany has a spot for me next week..i prefer it to the nearest hospital because I am quite certain the closer one is run by vampires since I have never needed so many blood tests in my entire life as I seem to need when I go there. Doc says he can not say for sure how long I will have to stay but he promised not to promise I wont be home for my husbands birthday..which I didnt quite grasp when he told me it dawned on me as I left that he thinks i may be in for another two week run (arghh).

I was misdiagnosed for a decade then ran through streams of medications and tests and told this wonder drug would cure all woes only to be right back at the drawing board..anyone wanna lend me some chalk?

LOL, very funny reading your post- good to see your sense of humour is strong! But, your story is not a happy one eh. I have learnt that docs & clinics cannot imagine that anyone would have a life, and I think their way of coping with us all is to block out anything we have to say that isn't about medis, treatments, clinical symptoms!

Sounds like you have a lovely family & I hope you enjoyed your anniversary

I try to keep my sense of humor even on the bad days.. Finally have a great doctor now if only his staff were nicer lol Although I have noticed they are much nicer lately but that may have something to do with me loading my 15, 14, & 12 year old sons up with soda and my 2.5 year old son and 1 year old daughter up on sugar before I took us all in to the doctors ofice. I find the louder they are the faster I get seen (yepp im evil lol) and then just before we are ready to leave I say real loud "why are you guys still in the waiting room dads been outside for the last hour" just to see the nurses face start to twitch. The Hubby and I have been together since we were 17 married 13 years on Sunday we have a small army of children so our anniversary wont be a big deal we will be spending a day with out kids and ordering in from my favorite chinese place =)

Hang in there Mamameli, and I do agree that you have a wonderful sense of humor, we need that with what we go through each day! Congradulations on your Anniversary, I too just had my 20th, and going on 28 years together, and he still puts up with me. I have to say THANK GOD for my family, they are my fight and they are my reward. I sure hope you find some comfort soon! HUGS!

MamaMeli! No postings for a while ... how are you doing? I hope you are well and busy.