Well Yesterday was a really bad day so I decided not to blog and to keep all my negative mean thoughts to myself :) Monday was my Doctors appointment and as planned after 3 months of methotrexate doing very little to nothing for me we are going to start Humira, which I am nervous but really excited about, so I did all the tests that are needed to clear me to start Humira, chest x-ray, tb testing and blood work and today I am going into the Doctors office to have my results read to me and hopefully if all goes well get my perscription for Humira!
Yesterday however my outlook was not so bright, It was a very hard day for me, I was sore all over and worse than normal the soles of my feet were more sore than they had ever been I was swollen and sore in almost every joint my entire left arm and shoulder were throbing from the cortisone shot my Doctor gave me and walking was pretty much immpossible for me so after a really crappy morning and day and very little sleep I realized it was also my Methotrexate day and that put me in a really foul mood so when I went to bed last night I took all the pain meds I could and prayed for a better tommorow.
So when I woke up this morning after sleeping through the night I was pretty excited, then I sat up and realized that I wasnt as stiff as I normally am and that made me a little more excited but when I stood up and didnt have a shooting pain through my entire right knee and leg and the soles of my feet didnt feel like someone had ran them over I was so excited I couldnt contorl myself from starting to cry in excitement. Even my oldest son said "wow Mommy, your walking better today!"
I feel like I can do this again, after a day like yesterday I was really questioning myself and my strength and doubting weather I could truly get through this and make it through all the pain and make it to the day when I find a medicine that works for me I know that this will be a long journey and there will always be up days and down ones but I pray for more up days than down