Depression creeping into an otherwise positive mind

Good news! My sister went home from the hospital yesterday!! However, that is not why I missed writing my blog. My hands have been acting up. I stopped playing guitar and have the students leading each other but the pain is still here. I limited my typing but the pain is still here. Driving home, I had pains shooting randomly through my hand and my wrist swelled up. The timing of the good news was well needed. I have been feeling like I am slipping into a depression this week. I have been trying to be positive and I know my pain isn't as bad as others but it is pain, none the less. I have been thinking about the future way too much lately and that tends to bring me down. I am trying to look at the changes as a challenge and I am trying to plan ahead however the thought is rather overwhelming. If I can help others, then maybe I can find a positive outreach and a way to make the disease more palpable. Ideas have been running through my mind about things I could invent to help others with this disease. There is just so many ways that it effects ones life. How one day you are moving great and then the next, you can't do things that we take for granted everyday. Today, driving hurt so my mind was thinking of things I could do to help me be able to turn the steering wheel a little easier. Carrying groceries was also a pain because those plastic bags, when too heavy, rip into my wrists and make my bones feel like they were coming out of place. Taking fewer bags at a time doesn't help that much because then my legs hurt from taking so many trips to the car. So I guess the best answer would be to use a fold up cart with a basket on it and put the bags in it, pulling it into the house, but that can be rough on the hands as well. I have already modified shopping by unloading the car to the steps; climbing the steps; and then taking the bags into the house - thus having to go up the stairs once as opposed to numerous times (the porch only has 4 steps but sometimes it feels like 100). Maybe my future career will be writing a book about all the modifications we can do to make our lives less painful. Or maybe I will become a famous speaker who travels the country talking about Psoriatic Arthritis and how to deal with life changes, pain management, or everything else we deal with on a daily basis. Oprah could see me speak and offer me a TV show, where I could take rest breaks as needed and not have to follow a rigid schedule - make millions from working two hours a day!! As you can see, my imagination hasn't been effected by the disease.

That is an awesome idea! I would watch it. I would do a reality show where people could watch me lay awake all night in fast forward and see how I prefer to crawl when no one is looking. I’m sure the world would really get a kick out of watching my kids play “hide the cane”, they’re good times.
I’ve heard some research lately that says inflammatory diseases and depression are connected. You should listen to this really cool interview from NPR.

And I’m happy to hear about your sister.

I understand the arm and wrist pain. Have lived with it for years but found I can handle most of it. my left arm has become very useless but I am near 70. One thing to always have checked is carpel tunnel as I have had 4 surgeries for this and although much of my problem was arthritis, this too caused alot of pain and post repair I was alot better for a long time. It came back but allowed me to cont. working for a very long time. I hope you can too. much pain can be distracted from if you are busy and and when it can't be you know you must have a bit of pain med or rest. Hot water has also been a blessing and bengay over night helps too. lots of time if the pain eased it meant the weather changed. Hope for the best for you Alice