Many of you know I have only been recently diagnosed with PsA. Looking back I can see that I have been suffering for more than 10 years with all my pain being blamed on other things: overweight, not enough exercise, etc, etc, etc
Since my diagnosis, I have begun listening to my body. When the pain is bad and I'm exhausted, I rest now. I take my meds like I'm supposed to, have changed the food that is allowed in the house so we are eating much healthier the last few months, and am scheduled to start yoga next week.
On top of this my husband has his own disability: intractable migraines, anxiety, depression, and what I think is fibromyalgia. I take care of everything for him, since in one form or another he is usually unable to do it. My parents are also disabled and require ALOT of time and attention from me. I typically make and take them to ALL of their appointments, make sure all their bills are paid, do all the errands and grocery shopping, and often even clean house for mom. Once all of this is done, I still have my house to take care of, and lets face it, with 3 of my own dogs and 1 I am watching for my best friend while she is in Europe, there is LOTS to clean. I recently (unbeknownst to my family) dropped out of school this semester. it was just to much for me to deal with. I am currently an LPN, and was working on my BSN, way to much work with everything else going on.
Anytime someone see's me sitting down to rest or watch TV, people think I have been doing it all day. Just because I don't do something for my parents doesn't mean I am sitting on the couch watching TV all day (If I were able to pull off a feat like that I should be no ones business). If I am not doing something for my husband does not mean I don't love him, it just means I need a few minutes to rest first. Just because I am not doing any of the multitude of things that need done around here, and have found a moment to rest and take care of me for a moment, does not give my in laws a reason to call me lazy. If I want to take a nap or sleep in till 10 am since I didn't fall asleep until after 5 am, they should all be supportive and not condemn me for it.
I have this disease that I thought my family understood and would be compassionate about, especially since my dad has been suffering with PsA for over 20 years, was I ever wrong. I realize, all of my hardships have been experienced by my parents. Many of them while they were working a full time job, in school, had kids, etc.
Even if I was physically able to work right now, there is no way I would have the time. The expectations of my ENTIRE family is WAY over the top. I am often overwhelmed and dream of running away to a place where no one knows my name (hahaha, they would still call me on the phone).
I apologize for the length of this, I just had to get some of this off my chest, and no one here would understand.