After reading Nym's story of her husband "helping her" into a dislocated shoulder and hip I thought we could use a club to discuss some of the funnier moments of being in relationship with PsA and another human being. There has been talk on the boards for a Singles Group to discuss the very different challenges of living alone with PsA. I know with my husband if I keep my humor life is much sweeter!
My husband and I purchased a lovely antique dining room set when we had lots of children still at home. Now that it is the 2 of us most of the time we tend not to sit in it often. We were sitting there one evening and I noticed the chair I was in was creaking. As I started to say to my husband, "I think this chair needs a little glue......" said chair leaned ever so slightly to the left and I slid very gently to the floor. My husband came charging around the table in full battle mode! I was on the floor saying, "I am fine" as he passed by me grabbing the chair and racing out the door with it. I was still on the floor! When I got up I looked outside. My husband was smashing the offending chair into tiny match stick pieces! My hero! I now have an antique set with 5 chairs......
One of the chores I have an easy time doing is laundry. Floors and chopping vegetables seems more of a problem. We tore out a shower in the main floor bathroom and put a stackable w/d there. I use pods and slide the laundry basket down the stairs next to me. I do not carry it. When the laundry is done I leave it on the landing of the stairs and my husband (or child) carries it up for me and I put the laundry away. In negotiating the land called "Marriage" I asked my husband if he could take over the floors and I would do all the laundry. He agreed. I should have foreseen during a flare he brought the laundry to me and laid the overly full basket on the floor in front of me while I was having a particularly bad flare saying, "I am out of underwear can you do some laundry?" !!! Well after the fire works, which entailed me introducing him to the w/d and showing him how it works and where in his bureau his underwear resides I started to laugh. It really struck my funny bone. Now when he is being less than brilliant I ask him if he needs his undies washed. It makes us both crack up. But it also an awesome reminder of the communication and compromise needed to be married and to live well with PsA.
Rob and I were staying overnight at a motorway services hotel. The hotel was actually on the opposite side of the carriageway, so we had to crossover the foot bridge. The traffic underneath us was slow moving because of an incident further up the motorway. Typical me, I wasn’t watching where I was putting my feet as I was too busy being nosy at the cars below. I tripped over my feet, tottered for a bit and fell on my bum, Rob, all concerned tired to pick me up whilst still carrying our overnight bag. He got me back on my feet, or so he thought but i just tipped over onto my face. He dropped the bag, picked me up and carried me the rest of the way over the bridge (no mean feat as I’m not a lightweight and he has problems with prolapsed discs) set me down and went back for the bag… By this time most of the traffic had stopped and I could hear hooting and clapping from the “audience” below. Bless him he was as red as a beetroot as he returned to me, but he was too polite to say if it was from embarrassment or the effort of carrying me lol
Ah I knew Rob was a keeper! Lucky you Louise, I am so glad he is good to you!
He certainly is Michael never known such a calm, caring person, love him to bits
I have the best husband ever to. I have always been able to move around the living room on my own. On his day off he helped move everything and also helped mop and wax the floors. We have been married for 8 yrs. He always made me laugh at work where we met. And has made me laugh everyday sense. He is dear to me . We are trying to make a new life because of PsA. Some good Some not so good.
I thought this was going to end with him racing past you to fetch wood glue, screws and tools to fix it!! hahaha!!!
michael in vermont said:
My hero! I now have an antique set with 5 chairs......
What a sweet guy!!
Louise Hoy said:
By this time most of the traffic had stopped and I could hear hooting and clapping from the "audience" below.
Isn't he funny Jane? You are the only other person on here who has met him and he is truly funny! His nick name was "Silver Back" he has a handle bar moustache and looks like a sheriff. He turns to goo when I look at him and starts stammering. He is so cute!
OK--I'll share. One of the things that dealing with PsA left me feeling was overly dependent on Ellen, my spouse. I used to do the floors, the vacuuming, the laundry and Ellen did what I hate most--the grocery shopping. When we moved into our current house we got a swanky new washer and dryer and spruced up that part of the basement so if I happen to drop something it lands on laminate wood floor not on gross and nasty old concrete.
Not long into my Dx things clearly changed and I stopped pushing around the vacuum and the mop, even the steam mop got put away--and I LOVE that thing. But, I had no intention of giving up the laundry. So stubborn was I, that I refused to give Ellen a lesson on how the machines work. There are lots of buttons and they play tunes when you turn them on and when the cycle has finished, so it is a bit daunting to try to figure them out (unlike the old top-loader we used to have). She would often ask if I would show her how to use it and I would make excuses to not. All because I was proud. I felt that if there was just ONE thing that she needed me for then she wouldn't reconsider us being together because she'd actually need me for something so she would keep me around. Pitiful, right? But that's how demoralized PsA got me.
Well, this laundry situation all blew up one weekend when she had asked for some laundry. I thought she needed clothes for the climbing gym but I was tired and very stiff and the thought of going down to the basement and back up the stairs just defeated me. So I didn't come through. She was kind enough to wait all weekend without prodding but Sunday night came and still no laundry. As it turns out what she REALLY needed was underwear. She got so irritated with me (for not having clean undies and for my not telling how the washer worked) and I got angry and defensive, then I cried because I felt defeated yet again.
But it all ended up perfectly because I figured out the real problem. Yes, I needed to buy her more underwear. So, I got her two six-packs from Target and we haven't argued about not having enough clean knickers since!!!
You know, NOT ONCE have I ever been all
owed to use the washing machine (or load the dishwasher) We won't go into the reasons. Until this thread despite 37 years of pouting, I have never felt like I have missed anything....... Next time the Mrs. Lamb leaves town, I think I'll give it a go........ Pray I don't break anything...
We can pray but you're having a rough streak right now--wasn't I just reading about some dude in recovery from shoulder surgery shooting at and missing some local wildlife? Just don't confuse the dishwasher for the washing machine. Plates don't hold up well in the spin cycle and rinse aid does nothing for socks.
Pray I don't break anything...
Lamb stay away from the expensive machines! I am still laughing about what you did to an innocent hospital room that had to be repainted when you were done!
I have a simple washing machine that’s easy to use but I hate my son with ADD using it as he cant remember how to use it and fiddles with all the settings and then hangs cloths on the radiator that dripping wet! So yes stay away from the washer if you don’t know how to use it lol Of course you could always read the instructions, but isn’t that a bit like asking directions?