So....after months and months of so much pain that I couldnt leave my home I finally begin to feel good enough and strong enough to leave the house and go shopping with my husband during the day while the kids where at school, now my feet are still giving my lots of pain and problems and my right knee is still sore so I hop a bit which makes me very slow so against my wishes I am forced to use a wheelchair or scooter so that I dont over do it because that will put me in bed for the next week and i know it! we head to the first store and i get in my wheelchair and my husband pushes me around I realize im getting some strange looks and i assume that maybe its because i am younger than most people that need wheelchairs and i have no visable reasons why i would need the chair so i just try and ignore them and continue the day out which i am enjoying so much well after a few stores we end up at the grocery store and i get into the scooter and we go through the store and do our shopping and my husband is a bit of a comedian so we are laughing and giggling and just having a good time together when a women walks up to me and tells me that "I have some nerve to take a scooter that someone else actually might need just to play in!" I am sitting there in shock so upset that I could have started to cry thinking to myself "how dare she judge me not even knowing what I am dealing with!" but before I could respond my Husband blew up and told her a few choice words....she stood there and called us liars and said i needed to get up and give her the scooter.....which my husband responded with well we are almost done and when we are you can have it....we ended up having the manager called over to us because the woman began to scream and yell
Luckily i had a brochure on PsA in my purse from my doctors office the day before along with my lab results and a completed application for a handicap placecard signed by my doctor which i showed the manager because i was in such shock that we were being attacked this way, he told me that he didnt need to look at my paperwork and told the woman that I had the scooter first and it wasnt her place to question customers about thier need for the scooter and then escoted the women out of the store.......I was shaking once it was all over with and the manager ended up walking us out to the parking lot just in case she was outside wating for us I cant believe the nerve of some people!!!! how can people be so hateful and mean?
Goodness! I'm sorry that happened to you :( people should know better than to judge someone's ability based on looks, but for her to react that way is just over the top :( i'm glad the manager handled it so well at least!
I am so sorry you had to go through this! It seems that the lady who says she needed the scooter so badly, should be one of the first to realize that others would need it as well. What ever happened to putting yourself in the others shoes? People are so self centered these days that they don't think about the other person anymore. Thank goodness your husband stood up for you like that, I love my husband but I don't know if he would do that for me. That manager did the right thing and handled the situation well.
Wow. How horrible for that lady to treat you that way. How wonderful for the manager to be so understanding and to walk you to your car - what wonderful customer service!
Oh my that is just horrible, some people can be so cruel. Ignore and try to forget it, it is not worth it. At least the manager was nice and luckily your husband was with you. I hope you are feeling better.
Wow that is awful! I'm sorry you went through that. Glad your husband was there to put her in her place. Try not to take it to heart (easier said than done I know). Hope today is better for you. ((hugs))
Ignorance is no excuse for rudeness! It is hard to believe that people will act that way. So glad it ended the way it did and kudos to your husband and that manager.
bummer I too am tired of grown up 2 yr old people feeling righteous deciding what i need ,should have etc. .
That is one of the worst side effects (looking as though nothing is wrong) in my opinion . Isn't it hard enough dealing with the guilt of not being able to work? I am afraid that this may not be the last encounter any of us will have. The situation always catches me off guard also, and i end up shocked at how simple people can be. Reflects the maturity of the person you were forced to deal with . You are loved , you are good..... never forget that.
Good advice Carolynn and remember you are not alone . I will be away from the net for about 2 weeks so i will catch up with ya then . Look in that mirror an give you self a hug for me.
p.s. your best weapon right now is knowledge of this disease , and things that can help with the pain . you will have to experiment a while to find what works for you. Later gator
Carolynn said:
Hi,
Oh my that is just horrible, some people can be so cruel. Ignore and try to forget it, it is not worth it. At least the manager was nice and luckily your husband was with you. I hope you are feeling better.
I always say I've heard/seen it all...then I hear something like this. No way you should have had to endure that. You and your husband were doing so great--making your trip in a chair a fun experiment. then this woman makes it her duty to rain on your parade. Shame on her. You shouldn't have to prove your needs to ANYONE. <insert choice words here!> Do what you have to do to enjoy yourself and feel better. Let the rest of them deal with their own issues, which they sorely need to. When I first started using a handicap parking permit, there was a cop who would hassle me everytime he saw me. Drove me knutsl Doc finally gave me a note to present to this guy: If you have questions about the care and treatment prescribed for this patient, please contact me." I gave it to the cop and we never heard from them again.. That guy was such a dweeb. Sorry you went through that!
Oh, dear, I'm so sorry this happened just at the point where you (with your husband's support) decided that you needed to do what it takes to get out here in the world. Sounds like this woman may have a whole lot of problems, and I'm sorry you ran into her. I'm so impressed at how well you handled this. You could have let it push you back into your house, or you could have held your ground, and you held your ground. I'm probably twice your age, and white-haired, and I still get looks when I use a wheelchair at sprawling airports when I need to travel. As if I'm in a wheelchair because I want to get a better seat on the plane - which is often the case for people with disabilities, and we do need more time to board, seats close to the front of the plane and seats closer to the restroom.
My husband clued me in that one problem is that I try hard to be pleasant to people, especially older people, kids and exhausted parents flying, so people may not realize that I am in pain and often feeling fairly miserable. Well, I'm not going to stop being nice to folks because some ninny can't figure out that a person in pain can also sometimes find it in themselves to be cheerful.
People need a lot of education about "invisible" disabilities. Until they get educated, I figure it's their problem and I won't let it be mine, unless they get in my face, as this woman did with you. This woman tried to make her problem yours, and you did a great job turning it right around and making it hers again. Congratulations. Good idea, Byrd Feeder, about the note from your doctor. I would have been less kind than you were and made a call to his supervisor.
I'm glad to hear that you are your husband can laugh, giggle and have a good time together. How wonderful!