Went to the free clinic today to see the doc and to finalize my remicaide infusion with him. He was in an incredibly bad mood. (I think he might have been having some memory issues as well today, which might explain his crabbiness).
Anyway, he was dismissive and just mean. Instead of giving you all a play by play, I'll give you some examples of things he said, and be done with it.
1) You know the Remicaide isn't going to work either, right? You might as well just resign yourself to that now. I don't know why you are bothering to switch.
2) psoriatic arthritis, psoriasis...they are the same thing. Its all just psoriasis on your skin, gut, and joints. (I had asked him to list psoriatic arthritis on my chart for the disability appeal)
3) Why did your rheumy add Sufasalazine? It is exactly the same thing as MTX. They are all the same. Why are you still taking the MTX? SO are you going off the MTX?
4) Are you exercising? (To which I responded, as much as I can) No you aren't. No one ever exercises unless they have to. (I obviously can't go out running, but I do what I can) You don't have to go running but you need to walk at least a couple of miles everyday. (Then I got up and hobbled out with my walker). Sheesh.
Yes, I know I need to exercise to keep my muscles strong and my joints mobile, but if I can't walk more than a few yards without sitting down to keep my knees from giving out from under me, I certainly don't think I should be walking a couple of miles. In fact, my rheumy told me that until we get this flare under control I need to find exercises to do that do not include walking, lifting anything over 10 lbs, lifting my arms over my head, or bending my knees. (I'm thinking the swimming pool at the YMCA is looking better and better)
My hubby knew something was up because I got "that look" on my face that says, "I'm super pissed off and may take your head off if you look at me wrong." Now that a few hours have passed I realized that I was letting the doc's crappy mood affect my own, which is pretty stupid. So I've let it go, and am taking it on faith that his nurse will read the protocols through again. that the remicaide will get sent, that the nurse will contact me when it arrives, and that the infusions will begin in early January as planned. <shrug> What else can a person do?
