Hi Grandma_J,
I hear ya! It’s hard to describe your symptoms in a way that the rheumy will understand or take seriously.
Have you tried the tips about talking to your doctor at Psoriasis.org? I just ordered a booklet/pack of info on how to talk to your doctor about PsA. There’s lots of advice on the site. I’ve found that the Psoriasis Foundation is an excellent resource for PsA.